Why Fast Food Has Lost Its A-pee-al

, | Canada | Working | May 2, 2012

(Two of my managers are showing a new employee around the restaurant.)

New Employee: “So, what’s that brush for?”

Manager #1: “It’s used to clean toilet bowls in the lobby.”

Manager #2: “Actually, it’s for scrubbing deep fryers.”

Manager #1: “Well, I’ve been cleaning toilets with it.”

Manager #2: “Er…I’m putting in for a new brush. Let’s keep quiet about this!”

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Equipment 1, Employee 0

, | Palmerston North, NZ | Working | May 1, 2012

(We have just finished eating at a fast food restaurant. Suddenly, we hear an employee yell from the back.)

Employee: “I hate you, you stupid shake machine!”

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The Product Of A Low Intelligence Quotient

| Springfield, GA, USA | Working | May 1, 2012

(I’m working on the register while my coworker works in our hot deli.)

Coworker: “Can you ring me up for two biscuits with the half-off discount and tell me how much it is? I rang it up on the calculator, but I don’t think it’s right.”

Me: “Well, what did you get?”

Coworker: “Well, I typed in $0.89 times two and then divided it in half, and I ended up with $0.89 again!”

Me: “[Coworker], really?”

Coworker: “What?”

Me: “What’s $0.89 times TWO divided by TWO?”

Coworker: *embarrassed* “Oh God. Just ring me up, please.”

So Easy, A Caveman Can Work Here

| Panama City, FL, USA | Working | May 1, 2012

(My boss mumbles everything he says; this is but one of his escapades.)

Me: *cleaning the register peacefully*

Manager: “Oi.” *mumbles inaudibly*

Me: “Sir?”

Manager: *mumbles again in a slightly louder voice*

Me: “Uh…right.”

(At this point, I resume my cleaning and look around to see if there’s anything else I can possibly do. A few minutes later, my boss returns and looks rather annoyed at me.)

Manager: *mumbles, and taps his chest with a single hand*

Me: *looks at him confused before pounding my fists against my chest in a gorilla-ish manner*

Manager: *seems to laugh and returns to what he was doing*

(Just after this, I realize I’ve forgotten my name tag and run out to my car to retrieve it. Upon my return, my coworker looks at me, perplexed.)

Coworker: “Where’d you go?”

Me: “Apparently, [my boss] and I have regressed to a much more savage means of communication.”

Coworker: “You can actually understand him? Good, then what does it mean when he scratches his head and points at the shiny lights?!”

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Pull Here

| Working | May 1, 2012

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