Occupation: Impossible

| Canada | Working | July 2, 2012

(I’m the only employee working in the store in the middle of winter. I’m supposed to be counting the cash, but a long line of customers means it’s an hour late and I haven’t even started. There’s also slush tracked in from customers all over the floor but I can’t even get out from behind the counter long enough to mop it up, the cigarettes and lottery tickets are running low, and the beer cooler is practically empty. Two of my bosses drop by to see how things are doing.)

Boss #1: “Why is the floor such a mess?! You’re such a slacker! If you keep slacking off like this, we’re going to have to let you go!”

Me: “It’s been super busy and I haven’t had time to leave the cash.”

Boss #2: “Why isn’t the cash counted yet?”

Me: “I’ve had non-stop customers for the last two hours.”

Boss #1: *mopping the floor* “I can’t believe you let it get this bad!”

Boss #2: “Why didn’t you call us and tell us there were no scratch tickets or cigarettes?”

Me: “I did, three hours ago. You said you’d be by in a few minutes.”

Boss #1: “You’re such a slacker!”

(At this point, a customer who has been in line throughout this whole exchange speaks up.)

Customer: “What do you expect her to do? Leave the customers here and go clean and stock stuff?”

Boss #1: “She should be doing both!”

Customer: “And how exactly can she do both?”

(Boss #1 ignores him and while Boss #2 comes out from the beer cooler.)

Boss #2: “Beer coolers are almost empty. You have to stock that right away. I also took some cigarettes and scratch tickets out of the safe for you to put out. Oh, and count the cash right now!”

Me: “Is there any way you can stock the beer for me? I don’t think I’m going to be leaving the cash for a while.”

Boss #2: “Nope! See ya!” *leaves*

(Thankfully, another customer went and stocked the beer cooler for me—but not before rolling her eyes at my boss.)

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Listening Skills Are Going To The (Hot) Dogs

| Florida, USA | Working | July 2, 2012

Me: “I’d like a foot-long hotdog with ketchup, mustard, and relish.”

Cashier: “Here you go.” *hands me a chili dog*

Me: “Actually, I wanted a hotdog with ketchup, mustard, and relish.”

Cashier: *blank stare*

Me: “This has chili.”

Cashier: *adds onions*

Me: “Uh…all right.”

Cashier: “Enjoy your burger!”

Miter Makes Right

| USA | Working | July 2, 2012

(My older brother is at work with me. He has a history as a bully, and is definitely used to people being afraid of him. He comes in while I’m helping a young female customer.)

Customer: “So, this is the basic design that I’ve come up with for the chest. I need to have eight of the boards angle cut and the rest just straight to these measurements and angles.”

Me: “Okay, I can take care of that for you.”

Customer: “Yeah, I just wish I had space for a table saw at home, but you know how apartment living goes. There’s a miter saw at my parents’ house, but I wouldn’t have a way to transport the chest to my apartment from their house if I built it there. So, the patio it is. ”

Me: *surprised* “You know how to use one?”

Customer: “Miter saw? Oh, yeah. It’s easy…just have to double check your measurements. Also, I’m looking for a wood burning pen and some stain.”

Me: “Something tells me this is going to be really nice when you’re done.”

(At this point, my brother decides to jump in with an unsolicited comment.)

My Brother: “Only if her boyfriend helps her.”

Customer: *dryly* “You’ve made two assumptions I’d like to point out. One is that I’m seeing someone, and two is that I’d want to.”

(His feathers ruffled, my brother takes on a more menacing tone.)

My Brother: “You don’t know who you’re messing with, little lady.”

Customer: “Someone who needs both manners and breath mints. Excuse me…” *to me* “Can you show me where those two items are, please?”

My Brother: *shocked* “I apologize—”

Customer: “Get bent!”

(The customer left our store soon after. When she came back, she showed me photos of the finished chest; it was absolutely beautiful!)

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If You Are Unhappy For Any Reason…

| Working | July 2, 2012

June Top Story Roundup

| Not Always Working | Working | July 1, 2012

June Top Story Roundup: From Harry Potter to hypocritical employees, here are our top-rated stories for the month of June!

  1. Banishing Bellatrix (1,178 thumbs up)
    A bad coworker gets fired from the Wizarding World by Harry Potter and friends!
  2. The Only Thing He Should Be Running Is Scared (1,171 thumbs up)
    An unhelpful boss is called out by a customer—who happens to be from Corporate.
  3. Accidon’t (1,128 thumbs up)
    “I do apologize, but the accidental damage plan does not cover accidental damage.”
  4. The Fabled Land Of Equality (988 thumbs up)
    A female gamer finds getting help from sexist employees to be more fable than fact.
  5. Some People Can’t Stand Being Shown Up (953 thumbs up)
    A pouty employee gets shown the heights of her hypocrisy!

PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

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