Word War Z

| Illinois, USA | Working | April 12, 2013

Manager: “Do you know why I called you in here?”

Me: “No…”

Manager: “You know there there is always something that needs to be done here right? There is no excuse for down time.”

Me: “Okay?”

Manager: “You’re into zombies right?”

(I am thoroughly confused at this point.)

Me: “Among other things, yes.”

(My manager pulls a book, ‘The Zombie Survival Guide’, out of her desk. I have never even read this book.)

Manager: “I don’t appreciate you reading on the clock.”

Me: “That isn’t my book. I don’t read on the clock.”

Manager: “I found this in the front desk yesterday.”

(She flips through the book and I see that it’s set up like work sheets and it has been filled in with pencil.)

Me: “Whoever owns it has written in it. I would never write in a book.”

Manager: “Well, I asked everyone else, and they said it wasn’t theirs, so it must be yours.”

Me: “Wait a minute… just because everyone else TOLD you it wasn’t theirs, and I’m the last one you’ve asked, it has to be mine?”

Manager: “Of course!”

Me: “Well, I’m going to go home now. My shift is over.”

Manager: “Do you want your book?”

Me: “It isn’t mine.”

Manager: “Whatever!”

(After that, I became the store scapegoat. I didn’t stay there for long.)

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