Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 33

(I am working at a software company. I usually don’t bother with troubleshooting calls as I am not a technician, but this guy calls before they get to work and I figure I can try my luck.)

Customer: “Hello, I have a problem with my app.”

Me: “Good morning, sir. The technicians are not in yet, but let me know what the problem is and let’s see if there is something I can do about it.”

Customer: “Well, I tried to send some emails through the app, and it failed.”

(I walk him through some settings and other trivia he may have not seen.)

Customer: “No, it still will not send an email.”

Me: “Well, sir, in that case, you have to login to our company website and open a ticket, and one of our tech support will be with you as soon as possible.”

Customer: “I cannot do that. I have no Internet connection.”

(I tried to explain the notion of the Internet and emails and how they interact, while at the same time trying not to start banging my head on my desk.)

Related:
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 32
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 31
Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 30