Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 25

(I work front desk at a hotel.)

Me: “Front desk. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Guest: “Yes, I was just wondering if you could maybe turn down the wifi?”

Me: “I’m sorry… Could you repeat your question?”

Guest: “Yeah, could you please turn the wifi down?”

Me: “I’m sorry; you want me to turn the wifi down? Are you having trouble connecting to the Internet?”

Guest: “No, I want it off!”

Me: “Well, I can’t turn it off; otherwise the other guests won’t have any Internet either.”

Guest: “Well, could you at least turn it down a bit, then?”

Me: “If you don’t want any Internet you can simply disconnect any devices you have from the wifi, but I can’t turn it down.”

Guest: *grunts and gives a deep sigh* “Okay, obviously you have no idea what wifi is.”

(The guest hangs up and a few hours later he comes up to the front desk and wants to check out a day early.)

Me: “Was there something wrong with the room that I could help you with?”

Guest: “Yeah, I want to get out of here because your d*** wifi is so strong! Maybe you should turn it down a bit so people can get some rest!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir; I really don’t understand what you mean.”

Guest: “I’m leaving because I have a headache! If you had just turned down the f***ing wifi like I asked my head wouldn’t hurt so much!”

Me: “I’m… sorry?”

(The guest left in a rage and when I told my manager what had happened he laughed and agreed that he had no idea what was wrong with that guy.)