Why Men Never Hear The End Of It

Me: “Joe?”

Fiancé: *no response*

Me: “Hey, Joe!”

Fiancé: *nothing*

Me: “Joseph!”

Fiancé: *no response*

Me: “Dumba**!”

Fiancé: *no response*

Me: *yelling at ear-splitting volume* “I will slap your mother with a fish, murder your puppy, and leave you in the forest to die with Cujo and the Littlest Hobo!”

Fiancé: *still no response*

Me: *muttering as I walk away* “…a**hole.”

Fiancé: “Did you just say something?”

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