Why Do They Always Return To The Scene Of The Crime?

I’m working in a hotel. A guy walks up to the night window and puts his phone to the glass showing his reservation without saying a word. I ask him for his ID and credit card, and he starts to pass his ID and a CashApp card through the drawer.

Me: “We don’t take CashApp. Do you have a bank card or a credit card?”

Guy: “Yeah, it’s in my car.”

He goes to get it and comes back.

Guy: “Y’all take cash, right?”

Me: “Yes. If you’re paying cash, we just hold a deposit on your credit or debit card in case of damages.”

Guy: “But it’s okay if there’s no money on the card, right?”

Me: “No, there has to be money on the card in case of damages. We put a hold on it to verify the funds are available to us.”

Guy: “All right, well, what if I go to [Store] and get a card?”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t take any prepaid cards.”

He groans and goes back to his car. Five minutes later, he comes back with his CashApp card and presses it to the window.

Guy: “Hey, why won’t you take this? It’s got my name on it.”

Me: “We’ve had too many issues with CashApp cards.”

…and the people who use them.

Guy: “But it’s got my name on it. It’s connected to my bank account.”

Because of the way he is holding the card, I get a glimpse of his name and make a mental note of it.

Me: “I’m sorry, we’ve had too many issues with them, so the owner has told us not to take them.”

He starts to wander back to his car, and I jump on the computer to check the Do Not Rent list. Hey, guess who is there already? I notice him ambling back to the window and I turn the mic back on.

Me: “Sir, your name is [Guy]?”

Guy: “Yeah.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you’re actually on the hotel’s Do Not Rent list, so I’m not going to be able to rent you a room.”

Then, he gets this glassy look on his face, gives a weird laugh, and just stares at me. It is incredibly creepy, to be honest.

Guy: “Why can’t you rent to me?”

Me: “You’re on the Do Not Rent list.”

Guy: “Why?”

Me: “It doesn’t say; it’s just a list of names and dates.”

Guy: “I didn’t do nothing.”

Me: “I’m sorry.”

Guy: “Why would I be on the list?”

Me: “I don’t know, sorry.”

Guy: “What’s it say?”

Me: “[Guy].”

Guy: “How does someone get on the list?”

Me: “There are a lot of ways: smoking in a nonsmoking room, damaging the room, being rude to staff, causing disruptions to other guests, illegal activity.” *Pauses* “Arguing with staff.”

Hint, hint!

Guy: “I didn’t do none of that.”

Me: “Sorry, but I won’t be able to rent to you. Have a good night.”

I turn off the mic and start to walk away to help this guy understand that the conversation is over, but he wants to keep arguing and starts pounding on the window, so I walk back and turn the mic back on.

Me: “Sir, I’m not going to rent you a room. It’s time to move along to another hotel.”

Guy: “But I didn’t do nothing.”

Me: “Management decided that we won’t be renting to you any further. We don’t have anything further to discuss. Have a good night. Please move along.”

Then, he starts yelling at me, but I’ve turned the mic off and he is slurring half his words so I honestly couldn’t tell you what he is yelling, but I think he is threatening me. I flash him a thumbs-up and a customer service smile and walk away.

He goes back to pounding on the window and then holds down the doorbell button, so I walk back and turn the mic back on.

Me: “Sir, you have no more business here. You need to leave, or I will have to call the police to help you leave. I’m not renting you a room, and you are not welcome at this hotel.”

That worked, and he finally left.

Why is he on the Do Not Rent list, you might be wondering? “Rude to housekeeping.” I know — I’m SHOCKED, too.