Why Count Coins When You Can Just Stuff Them Into Jars And Guess?

, , , , , | Right | November 30, 2018

(I work at a bank. A different branch has a coin counter for its account holders. We are a very small location without a coin counter, located in a mall. Policy says we aren’t allowed to accept loose change over $10 — only rolled coins — and we have a sign up saying this. A customer enters the store with his daughter, carrying a large pickle jar full of coins, and asks for it to be exchanged for paper money. When the teller explains policy, he asks to speak to me.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but we just aren’t allowed to take large volumes of coins. There is a coin counter at [Nearby Branch], or if you give me your account information I can give you free coin rolls.”

Customer: “I don’t have an account.”

Me: “Then I’m afraid you’ll have to purchase coin rolls. They sell them at the dollar store.”

Customer: “Why don’t you just count the f****** coins and do your job?”

Me: “That’s hours of work we just won’t do for someone who isn’t an account holder. I know there’s a [Coin-Counting Machine] at the local grocery store.”

Customer: “I’m not paying a fee to get this changed to folding money! So what? My money just isn’t good here?”

Me: “You’re not purchasing anything, and I’m not obligated to do a tender exchange for someone who isn’t a customer. You can visit [Branch] and see if they will let you use their coin counter.”

Daughter: “You don’t need a coin counter; just weigh the coins.”

Me: “It doesn’t work that way.”

Daughter: “Yeah, if you weigh the coins, you can tell how much is in it.”

Me: “No. Coins weigh different amounts, so you can’t tell by weighing a mixed jar how much value it has.”

Daughter: “Yeah! I Googled it, just right now. Five pounds of coins is like, forty dollars. You should give me eighty dollars for this.”

(She has been standing there the whole time, and in no way has Googled anything.)

Me: “No. It really doesn’t work that way.”

Customer: “Fine! I don’t need this bulls***!”

(He slammed the jar onto the counter and stormed off. We left it there for an hour, then turned it over to mall security. After ninety days, they declared it abandoned, and a security guard went through the jar. Mixed in with the coins were lead slugs. Despite this, when he actually rolled the coins, they amounted to about $170. They donated this to the same charity that coins in the fountain go to. All we can figure is it was a ridiculously poorly thought-out scam.)

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