Whose Wine Is It Anyway?

I was in the queue at the checkout with one man in front of me with a small basket of shopping on the conveyor belt. 

The shop assistant scans a bottle of wine and hands it to him, and both of them fumble with it: her handing it over, him taking it from her. In what seemed like slow motion, the bottle fell onto the little plinth the card reader sits on, *bounces*, tumbles gracefully in the air for a few feet, and then lands behind the checkout area with a massive smash.

Being British, we all go silent for a beat, and then everybody, me, the shop assistant, the man, other shoppers nearby who saw and heard it, start laughing.

There happens to be a store cleaner going past, who immediately starts dealing with the spill and glass shards, so it all looks like it’s quickly and easily dealt with.

Assistant: “Do you want me to get someone to get you a replacement? It might be quicker to get it yourself. It’s up to you.”

The man makes eye contact with me, and I shrug and smile: it’s up to him.

Man: “I’ll go get another one.”

He’s gone for about forty-five seconds, so that’s quick and easy too. He returns and seemingly, without thinking, puts the new bottle on the conveyor belt. Also, seemingly without thinking, the sales assistant picks it up and scans it.

Man: “There will be two on my bill now, can you take that off?”

Assistant: “Yeah, but you’ve had two bottles.”

Man: “But we dropped one of them.”

Assistant: “After I scanned it. So, it was yours.”

Man: “But I haven’t paid yet, so it was still yours.”

Assistant: “I’ve scanned it, so it was yours.”

Man: “It’s not mine until I’ve paid for it.”

Assistant: “I scanned it. What you do with it after that isn’t up to me.”

Man: “I’m not going to pay for two bottles and only get one, though, am I?”

Assistant: “I scanned both, so you have to pay for both.”

The man makes eye contact with me. Mine are like saucers at this point.

Man: “Call the manager, please.”

Assistant: “No. That’s £27.78 please.”

Man: “It bloody well isn’t, you know. Fetch the manager.”

Assistant: “He’ll only agree with me. You’re holding up the queue. £27.78.”

The man takes a deep breath, but at that moment, a manager appears.

Manager: “What seems to be the problem?”

The man and the assistant speak at the same time, both saying that a bottle of wine was dropped and a replacement obtained.

Manager: *To the assistant.* “Had you scanned the first one before it was broken?”

Assistant: “Yes.”

Manager: “Then I don’t see what the problem is. Sir, if you could just pay for both now, please, you’re holding up the queue.”

Man: “Goodbye.”

He leaves without his shopping, with both the assistant and the manager looking confused.

Manager: “I’ll void this off, and then you can help the next person.”

Me: “Yeah, no.”

I leave my shopping on the conveyor belt and also walk towards the exit.

Assistant: “And what was her problem?”

According to the customer services helpline, about an hour later, I was the third person to call in about the incident. Without asking for it, I got a £5 voucher added to my loyalty card and a promise that things would be changing at that store starting the next day.

I hope the man in front got more than a fiver, and I hope he got his wine from somewhere else. He deserved a glass or three.