Who Would Rather Hang Out There Than Their Office?!

[Coworker] thinks he’s so clever. Every time his boss leaves the office, he sneaks to the bathroom stall, sometimes for hours on end. It wouldn’t be so bad, but he does it regardless of what else he should be doing. He isn’t around for so many meetings, reports needed, or just answers to questions.

A few of us have complained, but [Coworker] is an office junior, deemed “harmless” and (from his boss’s point of view) a “decent enough” worker, despite him annoying everyone else and giving them more work.

One day, our systems go down, so we have nothing to do. But still, [Coworker] is badgering his boss about if he will be off-site again this afternoon. He always does this before he hides away, but this time I have an idea.

I get a few people roped in and speak to the cleaning team, who are more than happy to get even. Like clockwork, [Coworker]’s boss disappears, and not five minutes later, [Coworker] grabs his phone and headphones and goes to the toilet.

Unfortunately, they just so happen to be being cleaned and closed, so he goes downstairs. 

But oh, no, all the cubicles are full, so he goes to the other toilets, but again, they’re being cleaned. How odd.

This is where he surprises all of us. He disappears and is last seen going into the building area next door and into their portaloo, much to the annoyance of the builders shouting at him.

A good hour later, I grab something from my car. A bunch of builders are all standing around facing the portaloo.

Me: “Is he still in there?”

Builder: “You know that guy?”

Me: “Yeah, he would rather sit in the toilets than do actual work.”

Builder: “You need to get him out of there. Our guys have had to walk down the road.”

Me: “Well, you can use our toilets if you do me a favour.”

As asked, they placed their digger in front of the door. [Coworker] didn’t notice until five minutes before clocking-off time. He had to ring his boss, who then rang reception to let him out.

I don’t know if he got into any trouble, but he stopped hiding in the toilets after that.