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Who Died And Made You Chairman Of The Smoking Shelter?

, , , , | Working | November 24, 2021

The company had a big BBQ picnic a few months back. Everyone bought in their own folding chairs so we could all sit in the car park together. I managed to leave two behind and forgot about them for a couple of weeks. By then, someone had taken them to the smoking shelter and they were already disgusting.

I was going to chalk it up to my own stupidity and leave them, but a while later, I bought a pressure washer and figured I may as well give cleaning them up a go.

I picked up the chairs and went to put them in my car

Coworker: “Hey! Where are you going with them?”

Me: “Oh, they’re mine from home. I left them here a while back, but I need them.”

Coworker: “But that’s my smoking chair.”

Me: “No, that’s my chair from home. Look, it even has my name on.”

It also looked nothing like any other chair in the company.

Coworker: “But that’s been in the smoking hut for months. I need that!”

He grabbed the chair.

Me: “I’m not going to ask nicely. You know it’s not yours; you can see my name is on it. Let go!”

He pulled as I did, only to slip, fall backward, and land in an oil patch from one of the trucks. I told him to stop being so childish, and if he didn’t pack it in, I’d put a complaint in. He put one in against me, anyway, which I immediately refuted, being as he was on camera the whole time.

More than that, now he had complained about seating, the company looked at the shelter and found the makeshift shanty town it had been turned into. It had cardboard flooring and tarp curtains, and someone had actually damaged the metal siding of the building so they could plug their phone in while standing outside.

The whole shelter was ripped out and replaced with a safe and legal one, making the chair thief very unpopular.