When You’re In A Different (Oak)Land

I work in a big city public library in Canada.

Patron: “I’m visiting from Oakland, and I would like to see my daily newspaper.”

Me: “We have a San Francisco newspaper right over he—”

Patron: *Frostily* “I said Oakland, dear, not San Francisco.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t carry an Oakland paper. I can try to find it online for you.”

Patron: “If I wanted an online newspaper, I would have asked for an online newspaper. That’s terrible service! I pay your wages, you know.”

Me: “But you live in California?”

Patron: “Well, I certainly pay somebody’s wages!”