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When Your Boss Is The Law

, , , , , | Right | August 14, 2020

Me: “Good morning, you’ve reached [Law Firm].”

Caller: “I require a telephone consultation with the attorney.”

Me: “May I have your name, sir?”

Caller: “Why should I tell you my name?”

Me: “So that I can run a conflict check, sir.”

He grudgingly gives me his name. I ask a few more general questions, which he answers equally grudgingly.

Me: “All right, sir, the attorney’s next availability for a consult—”

Caller: “Tomorrow! It has to be tomorrow!”

Me: “I cannot guarantee that they will have availability tomorrow, sir, but I will check the calendar.”

Caller: “I am an important man, my time is important, and I need [Attorney] to speak with me as soon as possible. Which means tomorrow.”

Me: “Again, sir, I cannot promise to schedule you for tomorrow, but I will look.”

Caller: “You are terribly rude and useless, aren’t you?”

Me: *Pause* “Excuse me?”

Caller: “You are the most unkind and unhelpful person I have ever dealt with.”

Me: “I’m very sorry you feel that way.”

My boss, the attorney in question, is in the connecting office, and while she cannot hear everything I’m saying, she can hear my tone.

Boss: *Via chat* “You sound angry; what is this person saying?”

I put the phone on speaker.

Caller: “I tell you, if you worked for me, I would have taught you how to speak to your betters, rather than being argumentative and disrespectful!”

Me: “Sir, if you feel that I am argumentative and disrespectful, then I assure you that you do not want to work with [Attorney].”

Caller: “[Attorney] was recommended to me by several people! I will have only the best! And when I speak to them, I will tell them how unhelpful and rude you have been!”

Boss: *Via chat* “Schedule him for first thing tomorrow and transfer him straight to me, and I will tell him that I have no interest in working for someone like him.”

Me: “[Attorney] is available first thing tomorrow morning, sir.”

Caller: “Finally! This has been an ordeal! If you still have a job after tomorrow, I trust you will at least have learned common courtesy towards those of us who pay your salary.”

The next morning, my boss spoke with him for two minutes, told him off for his rudeness, said she would never work with someone so argumentative and discourteous, hung up, and blocked his number. I love my boss.

This story is part of our Best Of August 2020 roundup!

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