When You Wake Up In Weirdo World…

It is a regular weekday. I’m off work and running some errands. My first stop is the pharmacy. The pharmacist is an elderly, very white, very stereotypical German-looking lady.

Pharmacist: “Namasté!”

Next, I’m in the drive-thru of a well-known fast food chain.

Server: “All hail! What doest thou desire, fair lady?”

When I’m grocery shopping…

Cashier: “What’s the scene, jellybean?”

At the gas station:

Cashier: “Ahoy! Pump three?”

And finally, when I get home… 

Brother: “So we meet again…” *Creepy laugh* “It is time to d-d-d-d-duel!”