When Will These Liars Learn?!

A customer has been arguing with me about an expired coupon for the past five minutes. He swears that he called just days ago and was told that he would still be able to use the coupon, but unsurprisingly, he is unable to remember what day he called, the name of the person he spoke with, or even if they sounded male or female. The coupon is over six weeks expired, so there’s no chance that I or any of my coworkers would have told him that we would still accept it. Finally, the customer plays what he obviously thinks will be his trump card.

Customer: “I know the owner of this store! I will call him right now and tell him how horribly you have treated me, and by tomorrow, you’ll be looking for a new job!”

Me: “Is that so? Have you known him for a long time?”

Customer: “I have! We went to high school together. I went to the prom with his sister!”

I turn to the owner who, unbeknownst to the customer, has been doing paperwork at the other end of the counter this entire time.

Me: “[Owner], you never told me that you have a sister. Or that you were transgender!”

Owner: “I didn’t? I guess it never came up.”

The customer stares at her for a moment, his face turning several shades of red. As he leaves in a hurry, we can’t keep from laughing any longer.

Owner: “I’m sorry about that. I should have spoken up sooner, but you seemed like you had the situation under control.”

Me: “I’m glad you didn’t. The look on his face was so worth it.”