When The Hulk Is Hiding He Works In A Thrift Store

I’m an assistant manager for a thrift store. A piano is donated. It has obviously been tipped over as the sounding board has a giant crack in it. It’s an upright piano but is older and you can tell it’s monstrously heavy just by looking at it.

We kick around the idea of what to do with it for a couple of weeks when:

Manager: “Load it in our truck and haul it to the dump.”

We rolled it out back and there it sits for a week or so while I wait for enough guys to be on shift to help push it up the ramp into the truck.

A day before our dumpster pickup I get to work and see a utility crew out back doing some street work. I peek in our dumpster and note that it isn’t quite half full. Not wanting to waste an opportunity, I walk out to the utility crew:

Me: “How much weight can your skid-steer lift? Do you think it could lift that piano?”

A few minutes later, they’re lifting the piano into the dumpster for me; it fits perfectly.

The next day, I just happened to be finishing up loading scrap metal into our metal recycling dumpster when the trash dumpster pickup occurred. I try to keep my cool and watch out of the corner of my eye.

The loader groans a little over the weight of the dumpster and when it gets to the top dump point, the piano gets hung up just a little, so the dumpster needs to be shaken a little to dislodge it. The driver sees me and shouts over:

Driver: “What do you have in there?”

I began making my way back to the door and just casually say:

Me: “A piano.”

Driver: “How the f*** did you get a piano in there?!”

As I am opening the door to go back in I reply, like it was nothing special.

Me: “Just roll it up to the dumpster and lift.”

I let the door close behind me but not before seeing the look of astonishment on his face.