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When She Really Turns Eighteen, She Should Gift Herself Better Friends

, , , , | Right | August 16, 2021

There’s a local club I’ve been going to for years, and I’ve ended up friends with most of the staff (and worked the odd shift when they need extra cover), so sometimes when I’m not up to anything else, I’ll end up going there just to hang out in the staff areas and grab them coffee.

This particular evening, there’s a Drum ‘N Bass event on, and the club is filling up quickly. As my friends have become busy serving drinks, I head out front to have a cigarette and chat with the bouncers. A group of fairly young-looking people walks up to the door, and the bouncers ask them all for ID before they can enter. Most of the group show their ID and head straight in without issue, but there’s one girl who doesn’t have any ID on her. Her friends have already gone inside and left her behind, and she’s clearly desperate to join them. She tries to persuade the bouncers to make an exception, with no luck; the rules are strict. Eventually, her pleading reaches this hilarious stage.

Girl: “Can I show you my Facebook profile? That’s got my age on!”

The bouncers and I shared a look of disbelief and she was told that, no, that would not count as legal identification.

I was feeling a bit bad for her at this point because her friends, including her boyfriend, just left her behind and hadn’t come back to check on her, so I decided to kindly explain to her that the repercussions of the club letting her in without ID could lead to the venue being closed down and the staff losing their jobs, which is why they really couldn’t make an exception. She still seemed upset about being left behind by her friends, as the only one that did end up coming back to check on her just shrugged and went back in, but she wasn’t arguing with the bouncers anymore and understood that she was not getting in. I chatted with her a little more and she left.

Apparently, this was the first time the bouncers had been offered a Facebook profile as proof of age. We had a laugh about it, but honestly, I think her friends were also pretty crappy for just abandoning her.

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