When It Reigns, It Pours
(At the restaurant where I bartend, the owner has some friends over for a meal and is sitting and eating with them.)
Owner: *as I’m pouring wine* “No, no, you’re doing it wrong!”
Me: “Oh, sorry sir.”
Owner: “You’re meant to do it like this!”
(At this point, my owner stands up, snatches the bottle from my hand, and begins pouring a glass by nearly turning the bottle upside down.)
Owner: “Like that, see?”
Owner’s Friend: “Erm… you might want to not do that.”
Owner: “Hmm? why not?”
Owner’s Friend: “For starters, the young man was doing fine on his own. Secondly, you just poured red wine in a glass half filled with white. Thirdly, your shoes are looking a bit soggy now.”
(It turned out the owner had splashed red wine all down the front of himself. His friends not only apologised for him, but also tipped me well!)