When A Simple Salad Isn’t, Part 2

, , , | Right | November 12, 2020

I am the only counter girl this day, and since it’s evening, we are pretty busy. I try to get through my customers quickly and usually effortlessly, but some people just do not understand how ordering food works.

Me: “[Pizza Store], pickup or delivery?”

The customer orders a cheesesteak with onions and peppers.

Me: “All right, now are those fried or raw onions? And what kind of peppers?”

Customer: “Uh, fried, I guess. And hot peppers.”

Me: “Okay, but what kind of hot peppers?”

Customer: “Hot.”

I already know where this is going.

Me: “Yes, but jalapeño or banana?” 

Customer: “The cut-up ones.”

Me: “They’re both cut up.”

Customer: “Banana, I guess! And a large salad with chicken tenders.”

Me: Okay, what kind of salad?”

Customer: “Chicken tender salad.”

Me: “Yes, salad with chicken tenders, but what kind of salad?”

Customer: “A normal f****** salad!”

He hands the phone to his girlfriend, who inevitably repeats him, and we spend a few more minutes going back and forth.

Me: “Okay, do you want a Caesar salad—”

Girlfriend: “No Caesar! I want ranch!”

Me: “No, a Caesar salad, it has—”

Girlfriend: “No, normal salad with just chicken tenders.”

Me: “Do you want [list of salad ingredients]?”

Girlfriend: “Yes, with chicken tenders.”

Me: “Okay, that is a garden salad with chicken tenders.”

Girlfriend: “No, that’s a normal salad.”

I finished the call and had to go clean tables because I couldn’t deal with another customer for a bit.

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When A Simple Salad Isn’t

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