What’s More Shocking Is That This Caller Has Fifteen Friends

, , , , , | Right | February 28, 2020

I work in a supermarket café. As we are inside said supermarket, we have no direct access to the outside, basically meaning we have no windows or outer doors. We are also the type of cafe where everything is pre-cooked and stored on the hotplate and as it’s a supermarket we do not do reservations. I answer the phone.

Me:
“Good morning, customer cafe, [My Name] speaking.”

Customer:
“About time! I’ve been waiting three minutes already!”

As it’s a supermarket, all external calls get directed to the office and then transferred to who they need to speak to.

Me:
“I’m sorry for your wait. How can I help you?”

Customer:
“I want to book a table.”

Me:
“I’m sorry, sir, we are not that sort of café; we don’t take reservations.”

Customer:
“But there’s sixteen of us.”

Most of the local builders, barracks, and other workmen know that since we pre-cook everything, we can run out when there’s an unexpected rush and they will phone to let us know so that they aren’t waiting for more food to cook. Therefore, I think that’s what this was.

Me:
“Oh, well, in that case, thank you for giving us advance warning. Do you have a rough time that you will be arriving?

Customer:
“About 11:00 am. Don’t you need a name?”

Me:
“No, sir, as previously stated, we do not do bookings. I just need to make sure there is enough food cooked for that time.”

Customer:
“Fine, then, but we want a table by the window.”

Me:
“I’m sorry, sir, but I am unable to do that as we have no windows in the cafe.”

Customer:
“But it’s a hot day and we want a breeze!”

Me:
“I understand, sir; however, we have no windows in this cafe. I will be unable to help you.”

Customer:
*Irate and aggressive* “FINE! Do you at least have air conditioning?”

Me:
“The store is temperature-controlled, yes.”

Customer:
“Well, what temperature is it set at?”

Me:
“I’m sorry, sir, but I have no access to the thermostat and therefore, I cannot tell you that.”

Customer:
“WELL, GUESS!”

Me:
“I’m sorry, sir, I’m unable to guess the temperature.”

Customer:
“WELL, TRY!”

Me:
“I’m currently in a short sleeve shirt and I’m finding it very cool. Does that help at all?”

Customer:
“NO! That’s not helpful. Don’t you even have a TV or something to tell you the temperature?”

Me:
“No, sir, as I’ve previously explained, we are a supermarket cafe, within a supermarket; we do not have those kinds of facilities.”

Customer:
“But your website says you’re on the beach. How can you not have a breeze?”

We are near the beach but not on the beach; also, we are in a supermarket! I attempt to explain that there are two roads and a mini amusement park between us and the beach.

Customer:
“You’re being extremely rude and very unhelpful! I want to speak to your manager!”

My personal manager is on a day off and I tend to act as manager when she isn’t there, but I do not want to deal with this guy anymore.

Me:
“I can get you a manager; however, I will have to put you back on hold in order to go find one for you.”

Customer:
“NO! MANAGER! NOW!”

I am finally beginning to lose my politeness and getting a bit snippy with him.

Me:
“Sir, I understand, but I need to go across the shop floor in order to get you a manager. Are you okay to be put on hold?”

Customer:
“You are being very rude! Get me a manager!”

I finally lose all attempts at being civil and talk to him like the child he is acting.

Me:
“I will get you a manager. However, before I get a manager for you, I need to establish that you understand that I will have to put you on hold. This phone is mounted to the wall; I cannot take it and you with me to get a manager. This means you will have to wait two minutes while I get you a manager. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!”

Customer:
“Two minutes, then! I’ve waited enough already!”

I put the phone down, and tell the coworkers (who are staring at me as I’m now physically shaking with anger at the way he has been speaking to me) not to touch that phone and go to find a manager, all of whom are currently in a manager’s meeting, which I now have to interrupt.

As I go in they all stare at me, as none of them have ever seen me angry before.

Me:
“I need your rudest manager, please.”

Head Manager:
“I don’t want any of the managers being rude to customers.”

I interrupt and start to explain, and within five seconds…

Head Manager:
“[Other Manager], you don’t mind being rude, you can handle this one.”

The git hung up before I could let [Other Manager] have at him! Everyone said that they couldn’t believe I hadn’t told him to f*** off or hung up on him. I have to say I’m shocked, as well.

Luckily enough, everyone knows me as being someone who is never rude to customers and normally has very good temper control, so if he does decide to make an official complaint, they have no issue tell him where to stick it!

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