What A Dump

(The office building I work security for has an attached parking deck with multiple driveways. Security is required to check on the deck via both foot patrol and cameras. I come on duty to find this happening:)

Me: “Where’s [Supervisor #1]?”

Coworker #1: “He’s out at the parking deck.”

Coworker #2: “Yeah, and [Supervisor #2] is helping him.”

Me: “Why?”

Them: “Take a look at the camera footage.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I pull the video up from the last few minutes. I see a guy walk up one of the ramps, clearly trespassing. Then, he looks around.)

Me: “So, they went to chase this guy off?”

Coworker #1: “It gets better. Keep watching.”

(I do, and the next thing I see is the guy lowering his pants to take a massive dump on the driveway. He then pulls his pants up and walks away.)

Coworker #2: “[My Name], you should probably radio them to see if they need backup. That happened just before you got here, and [Supervisor #1] and [Supervisor #2] are trying to see where he went, because the cops are on the way. Oh, and the cleaning crew needs a call.”