What A Crappy Joke

, , , , , , | Related | March 13, 2020

(My mother’s small dog, whom I love more than most people, is a bit of a pill when it comes to doing his business outside. It’s not that he would rather do it inside; he just sometimes doesn’t seem to want to do it at all, and it’s something of a chore to get him to do a “number two”. I have him out in his yard one afternoon while my mother is doing something else.)

Me: “Come on, buddy. You can do it! Assume the position!”

(I keep up a stream of relative nonsense for a few minutes until my mother comes outside to continue her project. She pauses and watches me.)

Mom: “[My Name], what are you doing?”

Me: “Trying to get [Dog] to do what he needs to do.”

Mom: “By annoying him?”

Me: *pause* “Yeah! I’m harassing the s*** out of him!”

(The look I received could have melted stone.)

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