We’ve Been Hanging Around With Different People

Me: “There’s two squirrels running along the back fence. I can’t tell if they’re flirting or fighting.”

Dad: “Well, if they’re both boys or girls, they’re probably fighting. Otherwise, they’re flirting.”

Me: “Yeah, but how can you tell them apart? They look exactly the same!”

Dad: “You just need a pair of binoculars.”  

Me: “Right… and how do you sex a squirrel with binoculars?”

Dad: “Easy; you wait until they turn around and lift up their tail.” *takes sip of coffee, totally serious* “It’s the same thing with people.”