We’re Not Clowning Around Here

I am an amateur clown and my kids are begging me to teach them how to make balloon animals. I go to a big online retailer to find a balloon pump just like I have and order two from one of their marketplace sellers at $20 each. I receive two pumps that are of such poor quality and so cheap that I doubt even a dollar store would carry them. I message the seller immediately.

Me: “I received the balloon pumps. These are not the ones you have pictured or advertised.”

I include pictures of what I already had and what they sent.

Me: “You can see that what you sent is of extremely poor quality and would not last one party of balloon making. I would like for you to either send what I ordered and paid for or refund my money.”

Seller: “Oh, so sorry, friend, for the mixup. It would cost much to send back; how about we give you $1 off of each?”

Me: “$2? Are you kidding? They aren’t even worth that.”

Seller: “Okay, friend. We did send you two balloon pumps. To keep you happy, how about $10 off the order? Is that good, friend?”

I’m really annoyed.

Me: “First off, I am not your friend. I am a customer, and a very unhappy at one at that. Second and most importantly, you did not send me what I bought. I have sent you pictures and the information you need to prove that. I want a full refund, and if you send me a return label, I will send it back. If you do not refund my money, I will open a complaint of fraud against you with [Online Retailer]. You cannot advertise one item and then send some cheap knockoff and expect a customer to just accept that.”

They never responded, but my money was refunded. I did report them to the retailer and left a detailed review of the product, warning others to be careful who they buy from. I saw later that the seller was removed from the marketplace after several negative reviews.