We’re Closed Ten Ways From Sunday

I’m the opening manager. On Sundays, we open late and close early. I’m at the store a couple of hours before we open so I can get the end-of-the-week stuff done. The phone rings around nine am. I answer because it might be an associate calling out.

Me: “Thank you for calling. This is [My Name]; how can I help you?”

A male voice on the other end demands to know what time we open.

Me: “Sir, on Sundays we open at ten am and close at seven pm.”

Caller: “Well, obviously, you must be doing something wrong because your door isn’t open.”

I look at the clock, wondering if maybe I’ve lost track of time. It’s 9:15.

Me: “Sir, on Sundays we open at ten am.”

Caller: “Yeah, well, it’s f****** Saturday, so why aren’t you open yet?”

I check around me to make sure there are no hidden cameras; maybe I’m being pranked. No such luck.

Me: *Calmly* “Sir, it’s Sunday.”

Caller: *Pissed now* “You’re an idiot. It’s f****** Saturday. Today is Saturday!”

Someone in the background yells.

Background Voice: “It’s Sunday.” 

He cursed and hung up.

My associate later reported to me that a couple was hanging outside the doors banging on them and trying to get him to open them. He pointed to the store hours and then walked away. When he came back about twenty minutes later, they were gone.

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We’re Closed Eight Ways From Sunday