Well, When You’re THAT Accident-Prone…

, , , , , | Healthy | November 8, 2020

I am EXCEEDINGLY accident-prone, to the point that I joke that my hobby is keeping my doctors’ lives interesting. I also have a host of medical issues.

I seriously strained my right hamstring — it felt like a tearing, ripping sensation — last July while trying to lever a pokeweed root out of the ground — roots hard as trees and just as hard to remove. My friends told me that only I could manage to hurt my hamstring that way.

I started aquatic therapy for it, but my hamstring still hurt a lot, so my ortho ordered an MRI to see what was going on. I tell the MRI techs that, after a lifetime of x-rays, CAT scans, and MRIs, I have developed the ability to remain perfectly still for the entire time any of the tests are being done.

Apparently, they don’t believe me; they keep asking me if I am okay after each scan.

Me: “Why? Did you think I died here?”

Tech: “But you were so still!

Evidently, they didn’t check to see that I was breathing.

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