We’ll Bet She Never Imagined Having To Defend Herself This Way

The cafe where I work is next to a public park. As the weather warms up, people like to take orders out and sit in the park. There are two homeless men who also hang out in the park, and occasionally, cafe customers try to make staff “remove” them, even though they’re on public property and have never bothered anyone.

Customer: “I can take this out and sit in the park, right?”

Me: “Of course, but be aware that you’ll need to return your items here and that the park is public property and not part of [Cafe].”

She leaves. After a minute, we hear her screaming.

Customer: “Get the f*** away from me! No one wants you here! Don’t you dare even look at me!”

The owner locks eyes with me and makes a horrified face. We both start to rush outside to intervene when we hear:

Customer: “G**d*** goose from Hell!”

The customer standing in the park, sandwich and coffee held high above her head, and as we get outside, she lands a solid kick on the body of a Canada goose, which finally takes off running.

The customer turns to her friend, who’s staring with his mouth open.

Customer: “Never tell me Tae Kwon Do is useless again!”