We Picture Them Being Very Disappointed

I do a lot of contract photography for a university. Despite their desperate need for new stock-type photos of current students, they only ever send me to painfully boring alumni events where I take shots of old people standing around eating in poorly lit rooms. It’s also worth noting that they don’t use anyone else for photography besides me.

Client: “Our new magazine is going to print-check in a week, so send me your best action shots of our students. We’re looking for dramatic angles of ethnically diverse groups who are dressed professionally and have confident expressions.”

Me: “Why would you think that I have anything like that just lying around?”

Client: “Oh, and our alumni event is tomorrow, too! Some of our oldest donors will be there. Maybe you’ll get some useful photos there!”