We Know Them Inside And Out

(My older parents have friends, a married couple, who are very nice and friendly, but who both have a tendency to overshare on the medical front. They will happily discuss every ache, condition, medication, and doctor’s appointment they have, especially when explaining why they don’t feel well enough to hang out. One day…)

Dad: *scrolling through our landline answering machine on speaker*

Friend: “Hi, [Dad] and [Mom], I just called for a chat and to hear how everything’s going. I’m back from my colonoscopy appointment—”

Me: “W-What?!”

Friend: “—and everything is okay, but boy, am I tired! I think I need a nap now. Anyway, we’ll talk another time. Bye-bye for now.”

Dad: *looks at my face and laughs*

Me: “Did we really need to know that?!”

(No matter how my dad tries to defend it, I maintain that the answer is no. No, we did not.)