Volcanoes Don’t Kill People, George. R. R. Martin Kills People

(My sister and I are watching TV when an ad for the film ‘Pompeii’ comes on.)

Sister: “Oh, hey! Kit Harington.”

Me: “Uh-oh. That’s not good…”

Sister: “What?”

Me: “Well, if he has enough time to film a movie…”

(My sister’s expression slowly shifts to one of slack-jawed horror as she realizes the implications.)

Me: “But then again, he was in that Silent Hill movie, so maybe Jon will be okay.”

Sister: *snapping out of it* “That’s true! Yeah, he’ll be fine…”