Virtua (Fire) Fighter

(I’m a newly hired volunteer firefighter. Our fire station is not usually staffed, but contains several amenities such as a workout room and lounge to encourage our members to spend their free time there, thus providing faster response times for calls. I’m in the lounge playing Xbox with a friend. I’m currently terrorizing people in Grand Theft Auto when another firefighter walks in.)

Firefighter: “What are you guys doing?”

Me: “Practicing extrication.” *equips chainsaw and starts attacking a car with a screaming person inside.*

Me: “HANG WITH US, SIR! WE’RE GETTING YOU OUT AS FAST AS WE CAN!”