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Vinyl Doesn’t Taste As Good As Cake

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: MidnightBallad | October 29, 2021

I was working the desk at my job when a call came through from a customer. I answered and spoke briefly to a woman who explained her situation. She purchased some cases of vinyl flooring from us a couple of days ago, changed her mind about what she picked, and wanted a refund.

That’s not uncommon, so I thought nothing of it.

Me: “I’m sorry it didn’t work out. Would you like to exchange the cases for something you like?”

Woman: “No, I just want a refund.”

Me: “Okay, cool. Just bring the cases back as soon as you can and we’ll refund you the full amount.”

Woman: “Wait, why do I have to bring the cases back?”

I paused, wondering if I was unclear about something.

Me: “You… want a refund for the cases, correct?”

Woman: “Yes. That’s why I called.”

Me: “Okay, so just bring them back to the store and we’ll—”

Woman: “I’m not bringing them back. I just want my refund.”

I tried not to audibly face-palm. Did this woman not get how refunds work or was she slow at trying to pull a fast one?

Me: “Ma’am, we can’t refund you for the items if you don’t return the items.”

Woman: “Yes, you can. You have my card on file.”

Me: “Ma’am… I can’t do that.”

Woman: “Then give me to someone who can!”

I rolled my eyes and turned to my supervisor sitting at the computer next to me. He heard everything I said and gave me the “Is she serious?” look.

With an inaudible “Yup,” I handed him the phone. The second he said his name and position, I heard the woman give him a week’s worth of attitude and a bogus line about me “keeping” her money. I’m hourly, lady. I don’t get one red cent of your money.

My supervisor told her exactly what I had just told her and explained how refunds work as if she were a clueless old lady. By the sound of her voice, she could have been.

A few seconds later, I saw the line disconnect on her end. My supervisor hung up the phone and gave me a look, and we just burst out laughing.

My coworker walked by and asked what was funny.

Supervisor: “Some lady wanted to have her cake and eat it, too.”

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