Very Long Itching For A Fight

(Students #1 and #2 are senior boys, acting like they want to start a fight in class.)

Teacher: “Guys, can y’all please not fight in my class?”

Student #1: “Why? What are you going to do about it?”

Teacher: “I just really don’t want to do all the paperwork if y’all fight in my room. Can y’all at least wait until later?”

Student #2: “The paperwork? That’s why you don’t want us to fight?”

Teacher: “Yeah. A couple of years ago some students fought in my class, and I was still finishing up reports a week later. I don’t have time for that right now, so can you wait to fight?”

Student #1: “Okay, miss. We like you, so we can do this after class on the patio.”

Student #2: “Yeah, that’ll work.”

Teacher: “No, they’ll just look at your schedules and see that you both came from my class and I’ll still have to talk to the administrators about why I didn’t see trouble coming. You’ll have to wait a little longer. Maybe go off campus?”

Student #1: “Fine. After school in the park?”

Student #2: “No, I have to go to work right after school? Saturday?”

Teacher: “Just a reminder… prom is on Saturday.”

Student #1: “Next weekend?”

Student #2: “Sure.”

Teacher: “Nope… senior trip.”

Student #1: “Right after graduation?”

Teacher: “If you fight then, you won’t get to go to Project Graduation and you won’t get to win money and prizes.”

Student #1: “Oh, yeah. We don’t want to miss that.”

Student #2: “How about the week after graduation?”

Student #1: “I’m joining the navy. I’ll be going off to basic training right after graduation.”

Student #2: “Well, when are we going to see each other again to do this?”

Teacher: “Class reunion?”

Student #1: “Okay. We’ll fight at the reunion.”

Student #2: “Sounds good. Class reunion.”

(They shook on it.)