Very Green With The Language

| Friendly | April 10, 2014

(I am stationed in Germany with the U.S. Military. I learned German before arrival, and spend time in a few local bars with other military members. We are always polite to the servers and never get rowdy. About three months after I am assigned, a new guy shows up. He is a pretty rude type, but we allow him to tag along his first evening in country. He doesn’t know a word of German. A couple of beers into the evening, he looks at me and asks:)

New Guy: “How do you say ‘pretty’ in German”?

Me: “Why”?

New Guy: “I want to tell our waitress that I think she is pretty.”

Me: “Grün” *which actually means GREEN*

New Guy: “Hmmm. So how would I tell her she is very pretty”?

Me: “You say ‘Du bist sehr grün.’” *you are very green*

(My companions are doing their very best not to laugh. The waitress comes to the table and he pipes up and says it very clearly and very loudly. She just looks at him strangely, and I rattle off an apology for my friend and tell her that he is drunk. She stays away from his side of the table for the rest of the evening. The new guy has the hardest time trying to figure out why she was offended.)

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