Very Bad Reception

| Working | August 1, 2013

(I’m calling my dad at work to come get me from school, as I’m sick. He’s just gotten a new receptionist.)

Receptionist: “Hello, Mr. [Last name]’s office; how may I help you?”

Me: “Hi, I’m [my name], [my Dad’s name]’s daughter. Can you put me through to him?”

Receptionist: “Look, missy, I don’t know what you’re trying to pull, but it’s not going to work on me!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Receptionist: “I know he doesn’t have a daughter. What kind of idiot do you take me for?”

Me: “Unless my birth certificate is wrong, I assure you, I’m his daughter.”

Receptionist: “Look, I don’t care what you’re selling. If you’d been honest, maybe we would have listened to you, but because you lied, no! You’re an unprofessional little s*** who makes s*** up to get her job done instead of actually working! So go f*** yourself!”

(The receptionist hangs up. Several seconds later, the phone rings.)

Me: “Hello?”

Dad: “Hey, sweetie! I’m sorry she was such a b****; she’s not going to be working here long. Now, what do you need?”

(In the background, I hear the receptionist protest.)

Receptionist: “What the f*** do you mean I won’t be working here long? I just stopped a f****** telemarketer from bothering you!”

Dad: “No, you just cussed out my thirteen-year-old daughter. You can pack up your things now.”

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