Verbal Diarrhea

| Related | August 20, 2013

(My two sons, aged six and eight are playing video games. I hear my six year old say the ‘S’ word out loud.)

Me: “That’s a bad word! If you guys use that word again, you’ll be grounded!”

Eight-Year-Old Son: “[Six-year-old] is so stupid; that’s why he’s always in trouble. You can’t ground me, mom. I would’ve yelled ‘poop.'” ‘Oh feces!’ ‘Defecation!’ ‘Fecal matter!’ ‘Oh excrement!’ Or ‘explosive diarrhea!'”

Me: “Oh, you’d be grounded the same! Where did you learn all those words?”

Eight-Year-Old Son: “Oh, my vocabulary? It’s from the electronic dictionary you bought me.”

Six-Year-Old Son: “Mom, you should really ground yourself.”

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