Vanilliver

, , , , | Right | August 5, 2020

A middle-aged woman comes up to my register and puts her items on the belt. She is acting very strangely and is obviously under the influence of an illegal substance. She places a purple can of cat food in front of me and looks at me very seriously.

Customer: “Hmm, uh, um…”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “Do you know, um… this is… is this vanilla?”

Me: *Dumbfounded* “Um… no. This appears to be liver. I don’t think we sell vanilla.”

Customer: “Oh, I wanted the vanilla one.”

Me: “Yeah, I really don’t think we carry vanilla. Do you still want this one?”

Customer: “Oh, sure.”

I rang her out without further incident. None of my coworkers I told had any thoughts on the mysterious “vanilla cat food.”

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