Use Your Head… But Not Like That

My store has an automatic sliding door just like a grocery store. At close, we power it off so it won’t open automatically, but we can’t lock the door until all the customers leave because that’s illegal in my state.

One night, I power off the door at close and go have the cashier that isn’t currently ringing up customers ring me up for some items. We hear knocking on the door. A customer is making the praying sign with his hands and begging to come in. Since it’s after close, I legally don’t have to let him in.

Me: *To the cashier* “I’m going to ignore him.”

This man then pries open the doors and walks in.

Man: “Please, please let me shop!”

If I wasn’t going to help you before, why would you breaking into the store after close make me want to help you more? I rush over to the man, pointing to the door.

Me: “Sir, you need to leave right now. We are closed, and you just pried open the doors that were powered off.”

He starts backing up out the door.

Man: “Please? Just make a special exception for me.”

He sees this as if I know him and think he’s special. The man is now outside the store, so I turn toward the edge of the door and slam it shut, only to hear the man exclaim:

Man: “You just slammed the door on my head!”

I look at the man, dumbfounded. His whole body is outside the door, but he is leaned forward so that his head is squished in the door. My first thought is to say, “Well, you shouldn’t have put your head there,” but I am too speechless at this customer’s stupidity. You would think that someone would keep their body out of the way of a door someone is closing.

Man: “Wow, you’re not even sorry!”

He pulled his head out and scurried off. I honestly don’t know what he was thinking.