Unscripted Management

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | Working | March 26, 2014

(I was never too fond of answering the phone at my workplace. It’s usually the cashiers’ job, and I never bothered to learn the proper protocol. The phone happens to be ringing one day, and no cashiers were present to answer the call.)

Me: “Hello, [Store].”

(I recognize the voice on the line. It’s my manager.)

Manager: “Who am I speaking to?!”

Me: “Oh, hi, [Manager].”

Manager: “You don’t answer the phone like that! Follow the proper script!”

Me: “Okay, sorry.”

(Once again, answering the phone normally isn’t my job, so I thought nothing of it. A couple of days later, the phone rings again, and I’m the only one left to answer it again.)

Me: “[Store]. How can I help you?”

Manager: “I told you not to answer the phone like that! Start practicing the script!”

Me: “Oh, yikes. Hi, [Manager].”

Manager: “Do that again, and I’ll write you up!”

(He seems pretty serious, so I actually practice the script, in the unlikely event that the phone would ring again when no one else is available. By some stroke of luck, the phone rings again about a week later, with no one to pick it up.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store] located in [Location]. This is [My Name] speaking. How may I be of assistance today?”

Manager: “What the f***?! When did we start using pre-recorded messages?!” *hangs up*

(I’ve given up. When the phone rings and no one is there to answer, I walk away from it, like everyone else has been doing.)

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