Unmasking His Numerous Failings

I go to a local chicken place to pick up something for dinner and the drive-thru lane is ridiculously long. I opt to just park and go inside where I can see no one else is. Luckily, I keep a mask in my car in case of situations like these.

While I am inside, four other people arrive: three men and one woman. All are about age fifty or over. Two of the men are wearing masks and the woman and one man are not. I order my food and step to the side to wait. During this time, the man not wearing a mask, dressed in a full cowboy get-up, begins berating me and the other two men for wearing masks, saying, “That’s not gonna do s***.” The other two men start defending themselves from this completely uninvited criticism, and soon, all three are arguing over masks.

I finally have enough listening to this guy and politely tell him that none of us asked for his opinion. He wheels on me, gets very upset, and tells me I need to respect him because he’s sixty-two years old. He says this like he’s proving a point, to which I simply reply, “Good for you.” 

He continues to say that people like me are what’s wrong with America and insulting my weight. 

He steps up to me like he’s going to take a swing at me, but I continue to lean against the wall, not rising to the bait. The other customers are shocked at how mad the guy is getting. 

The line finally moves and the guy keeps muttering under his breath at me. My order is finally ready and I get my order. When I get outside, the woman who was inside says she is going to wait for the man to exit so she can write down his license plate number. It seems she smelled something on his breath and knew he shouldn’t be driving. 

The moral of the story? Just stay in the car and wait in line!