Unlucky Number Thirteen

I used to coach gymnastics for what were largely upper-middle-class and above clients. A particular housewife loves to find ways to talk about how much money her husband makes in several conversations with me and others.

Client: “My husband wants to know why we were charged thirteen times for the monthly tuition fees last year.”

Me: “We charge every four weeks, not every month.”

Client: “Every four weeks is a month!”

Me: “Not a calendar month. In the contract you signed it’s written clearly that it’s every four weeks.”

A couple days later her husband comes in and starts demanding an explanation.

Client’s Husband: “Why was I grossly overcharged last year?! I am not satisfied with the explanation you gave my wife!”

Me: “As I explained, we charge every four weeks, not every calendar month. That means—”

Client’s Husband: “—Listen, honey. I am the top salesman for a multi-million dollar company. I don’t need a little girl who teaches kids to do somersaults to be explaining what a calendar month is to me.”

Me: “Then I’ll break it down. There are fifty-two weeks in a year, and fifty-two divided by four is thirteen.”

He’s still glaring at me, but his silence indicates he still isn’t quite getting it. I pull out a calendar and count it out to him. He gets huffy and walks out.

That was about four years ago, and they still bring their kids as far as I know.