Unloading Some Beautiful Malicious Compliance

A customer parks in the area blocking our fire exit, which is clearly sign-posted. She comes in full of attitude.

Customer: “I want a [complicated coffee order], and hurry.”

Me: “I’d be happy to, ma’am, but first I need you to park your car in a proper parking space. Where it is right now is blocking our fire exit.”

Customer: “Just make my drink. You won’t catch fire in the time it takes you to make it.”

Me: “Ma’am, I am afraid I will need to insist.”

She gasps at the perceived oppression but she goes back to her car and spitefully moves it over. While she does leave the area blocking the fire exit, she pulls up instead into our loading area, which again, is sign-posted. She comes in again.

Me: “Ma’am, I will start making your drink, but please be aware you’re parked in our loading area. That space is next to our storage room doors and is reserved for deliveries.

Customer: “Whatever, just hurry up with my drink.”

I am about to, but with perfect timing I see one of our delivery trucks pull up to the space. It can’t get in because of her car.

Me: “Ma’am, I will continue to make your drink, but please move your car. Our delivery truck is here and they need to—”

Customer: *Interrupting* “Just unload around me.”

Me: “Pardon me, ma’am?”

Customer: “Ugh, just unload around me! I’ve already moved once, I am not moving again!”

In this time my manager has gone out to see what is happening, and then gone to speak to the delivery drivers. He now comes up to me and I explain what the customer has said.

Manager: “She wants us to unload 10,000 paper cups and novelty mugs around her? Fine.”

He instructs me to make the drink a little slower than usual and by the time our customer is strutting out, the truck is blocking her in, and my manager has piled all the delivery boxes around her car, making a little ‘fort.’

I can’t hear, but I can see her screaming and actually stomp her foot, while my manager is telling her (as he later tells me) that he is merely “unloading around her” like she asked us to do.

The louder she screamed the slower my manager took, making sure to stop working and respond to her every time.

For a woman in a hurry and who was too lazy to move, she had to wait forty-five minutes before my boss checked every… single… item on the inventory. Twice.

This story is part of our Best Of October 2020 roundup!

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