United States Of Alphabetization

(It is a family tradition to sit around the TV together and watch the opening ceremonies for the Olympics. It is the London 2012 ceremony, where each country walks into the stadium and is announced in alphabetical order.)

Dad: “Uh, why hasn’t America marched yet? We’ve already passed the A’s!”

(We are all speechless, but out of respect for the family patriarch, we say nothing, but my mother shouts to us from the kitchen.)

Mom: “It’s United! United States! Idiot!”

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