Dirtying One’s Hands

(I see on the floor a bath mitt/puppet, where you put your hand in it and the mouth moves. This one, in particular, is a unicorn. It is dirty from being on the floor. I pick it up, walk over to my coworkers, put my hand in it, and say.)

Me: “I’m a dirty unicorn.”

(Pause.)

Me: “That sounded really bad.”