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Unintentionally Planted Knowledge

, , , | Working | January 13, 2022

My husband loves plants. I don’t love plants and don’t remember many of their species or names. I do know my husband’s favourite plants species: the Anthurium, the Spathiphyllum, and the Bromeliad. That’s all the plant species I know and recognise; everything else is “something green” to me.

At work, to keep up appearances, the CEO decided that all the plants will now be maintained by a company that is also a florist. They come once a month, water the plants, and change plants that are dying. They pick plants that are sturdy and need little water or that look fancy (but are probably dead at the end of the month). The floral company always puts a big centrepiece in the hallway.

I overhear some coworkers talking.

Coworker #1: “I wonder what kind of plant that is.”

Coworker #2: “I have no idea; let me Google it.”

Me: “Oh, that’s a Spathiphyllum.”

Coworker #1: “Oh, are you sure?”

Me: “Yes, this is one of my husband’s favourite plants. I don’t know anything about plants myself.”

A month later, we get a new centrepiece.

Coworker #1: “Hey, [My Name], we got a new piece. Do you know what it is?”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. I don’t know anything about plants. I only… Oh, wait, that’s an Anthurium.”

Coworker #1: “You really know plants!”

Me: “No, I don’t! This is just one of my husband’s favourite plants.”

A month later, we get a new centrepiece. 

Coworker #1: “Well? What did we get this time?”

Me: “I told you, I don’t know anything about plants. I only know three plant names: Anthurium, Spathiphyllum, and… oh, no… That’s a Bromeliad.”

Coworker #2: “Aw, I was hoping you’d be wrong! I now have to treat him to a coffee. I’ll win the bet next month, I’m sure of it!”

I am now known as the “crazy plant lady”. It doesn’t help that the floral company keeps on using these three plants.

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