Unicorns, Goats And Squids, Oh My

(I’ve recently started dating a coworker. We communicate throughout the work day using an IM program. I’m away from my desk when he asks a question about movie and dinner plans we have for later. For reference, there are a lot of wildfires nearby and, being in a valley, it’s been smoky for a few weeks.)

Boyfriend: “What time is this dinner happening?”
Boyfriend: “Does [friend] know I’m coming?”
Boyfriend: “Will there be enough meat?”

(At this point, he realizes I’m not there at the moment.)

Boyfriend: “Why is there so much smoke?”
Boyfriend: “What causes waves?”
Boyfriend: “What happens when we die?”

(10 minutes later, I get back to my desk and find this list of increasingly silly questions. Naturally, I try to answer them all.)

Me: “Dinner’s at 6, and he knows you’re coming.”
Me: “The atmosphere is breaking down and it’s causing smoke from space to steep into our air.”
Me: “Giant squids. They cause waves.”
Me: “When I die, I’m going to be reincarnated as a unicorn. You… we’re undetermined as of yet. Maybe a goat.”
Me: And most importantly, there will be enough meat.”