This happens over time. First, I got a kitten when I was ten years old. She was a replacement for the cat I lost a couple of years earlier, who had been a sixth birthday present. The second kitten was a half-Siamese beauty that came from a litter of barn cats that my dad’s secretary owned.

The first time I saw her, our eyes met, and eternal friendship was forged between girl and kitten. She was about eight weeks old, and her eyes changed from blue to green.

When I brought her home, I gave her food and water, and named her Sama. My parents were divorced, and my dad, brother, and I lived in a two-bedroom apartment in a decent complex. Not the best, but it could certainly have been worse.

Over time, the kitten’s fur got darker, and I grew more fond of her. She grew into a beautiful adult cat, and I spoiled her. She always had food and water, Dad cleaned out her litterbox, and I gave her treats and catnip.

But we also had our not-so-fun moments.

Like the night when I fell asleep with gum in my mouth and got it all over her. She was a sight to behold the next day, and a lot of her fur had to be cut off.

The numerous times I tried to give her a bath. Being a cat, she didn’t care for baths. She couldn’t swim well, and her fur was not insulated. The time I accidentally stepped on her tail. She made a racket like you would not believe. The time she jumped on the table and sent my homework flying everywhere.

When I moved in with my mom for the first time, she refused to be put in the carrier and climbed up to the wooden platforms on the ceiling. We had to wait until she got hungry and came down for food.

A few years pass. I move back in with my dad, who has partial custody, and she stays with Mom, who takes better care of her, anyway, and makes me clean out her litterbox.

One day, I’m a junior in high school, and she’s seven years old. Someone had been peeing in the house, but we didn’t know who. I feel a wet spot on my thigh, and I turn around, and she’s peeing on my new clean sheets. She’d never peed outside her litterbox, as far as we knew.

When I tell my mom, she turns to the dog and says “I was blaming you!”
It turns out that Sama had a UTI infection, and had to be put on antibiotics to control her urinating. She does well for a while, but then it returns again and again. Finally, we get it under control.

A few years pass, and I’ve graduated high school. I’m not proud of my high school career, but she helped me get through it, including depression and auditory schizophrenia. I start my second job at a grocery store, meet a boy, and fall in love. I lose my virginity to him.

Then things go south. The boy dumps me, I have a psychotic breakdown and quit my crappy job, and I start living at home. Mom gives me an allowance to get by, even though I still live with her and don’t have to pay anything. I start going to therapy.

Then I stop taking my medications and stop going to therapy. Mom gets mad and throws me out, but the cat stays. Mom goes through a few boyfriends before landing her current boyfriend, who she has been dating for three years.

Sama is still there. She needs insulin and shots for pain and diabetes, and she’s fifteen years old now, and she has begun renal failure. I know I’m going to lose her soon. She’s been my best friend for fifteen years. It happens with all old cats. She’s picked on by our current dogs, especially the German shepherd, but she fights him and will use her teeth if she needs to. She likes going outside and eating treats.

She is my soulmate, my familiar. I don’t know when I’m going to lose her, but I know that when I do, it will be the worst pain I will have ever gone through.

My family moved to a neighborhood that was supposed to be nice quiet and family friendly. What we got was everything but those.

We soon learned this entire neighborhood is being bullied by an 11 year old girl and her mother. If any other kid has a toy that princess doesn’t she turns mean.

Kids have been hit, kicked, even stabbed by this child and talking to her mom is no help. Her mother makes excuses for her daughter refuses to punish her and tells her that if the other kids just give up what she wants it wouldn’t be a problem.

They have a reputation of running off anyone that stands up to them and at this point my family along with others is looking to move again.

(My bf has called me to say goodnight as he often does when I’m stressed/sick. My dad recently was in the hospital, so its safe to say I’ve had very little sleep recently.)
Me:*trying to say I love you baby* “I love you buddy.”
Him: “……..”
Him: “Was I just friend zoned by my own girlfriend?”
Me: *bursts into uncontrollable laughter*
(Safe to say I went to bed shortly after and got a goodnight rest. He still teases me about this, and brought me my favorite expensive chocolate and a stuffed panda. I think he’s a keeper!)

This occurs during fencing club training. One of the veteran fencers was fencing a newbie, and the newbie just got stabbed in the groin. The rest of the fencers; me, another veteran fencer and his opponent are all looking at him while suppressing laughter.

Newbie: *rolling on the floor in pain* F*ck! Is that even legal!

Opponent: Yeah, the d*ck is in the accepted target zone for both foil and epee.

Veteran: Uh huh, perfectly viable tactic.

Newbie: *Still clutching his family jewels on the floor* Seriously?

Me: *slinging an arm over [Veteran]’s shoulder* Yep. And something tells me that all of three us love using that tactic.

[Veteran], [Opponent] and I all smile unrepentantly and nod, giving double thumbs up to [Newbie].

Newbie: *Betrayed voice* Isn’t that cowardly? Don’t you have pride as a man?

Me: Nope. I’m transgender. No such thing as male pride.

Opponent: Who cares as long as you win?

Veteran: I have, but that and winning are separate.

Newbie: *flips us off while still rolling on the floor, muttering Russian swear words*

Coach: *Walking out of supply closet* You know, I once had a student who got hit down there so many times and got very angry about it, so he would take one of these *shows us the plastic armour cup meant for girls to wear over their breast* and put it down there instead.

The coach puts the boob armour over his groin and thrusts it out proudly, all of us doubling over in laughter at the sight of him and the idea that someone was silly enough to do such a thing.

Coach: *unfazed by the hilarity* Anyone want to borrow this?

Newbie: *holds out hand* None of you say a damn thing. *receives cup from the coach* Especially to the girls!

We told the girls. They found the whole incident as hilarious as we did. [Newbie] has yet to live it down.

My husband and I are at an impromptu nice dinner, and we’re sitting near a sunny window, though the rest of the place is a bit shadowy.
Husband: You look so beautiful right now.
Me: Ha! I always look fantastic in candlelight and darkened rooms.
Husband pauses.
Husband: You are amazing in the dark.