My boyfriend and I are on a double date with his best friend and his own girlfriend. I’ve never met [Best Friend] before, though apparently he’s been friends with my boyfriend since Primary school. The four of us have stopped for lunch and are discussing our lives. The two guys are still serving their mandatory two years in the army, while we girls are in university.

Me: “So I know that [Boyfriend] is in Infantry, but what about you? Which unit are you in?”

Best friend: “Uh, that’s classified.”

Me: “Well, can you at least tell me what you do? A general job description?”

Best friend: “Uh well, I’m…”

His Girlfriend: “Go on then. I wonder which one you’ll say.”

Best friend: *sighs* “I’m a spy. I work in Military Intelligence.”

Me: “Stop joking.”

Boyfriend: “Nah, he’s telling the truth. He went through an absurdly through security check. They even interviewed me and [Boyfriend’s brother] as part of it.”

His Girlfriend: “He told me he was a glorified peeping Tom. I laughed so hard at that.”

Me: “Glorified peeping Tom?”

Best friend: “Uh huh. My commanding officer told me that I could either say that I was a spy or a glorified peeping Tom. Both are pretty much accurate.” *pauses* “Or a commando. But that’s a blatant lie.”

Me: “I don’t suppose you can tell me just what you get up to?”

Best friend: “Basically voyeurism. And it’s not even the *fun* sort of peeping. Just don’t ask who or what I’m spying on.”

Me: “What? No high speed car chases? No deep undercover infiltrations?”

Best friend: “Contrary to what James Bond will tell you, spying involves a disgusting amount of time spent behind a desk staring at a screen. I’ve lost my six-pack because I never exercise in my job at all.”

At this point the conversation got sidetracked as his girlfriend was openly dubious that he even had a six-pack in the first place, and the two of them started bickering.

Still, never would’ve thought that I’d actually meet a spy in real life.

Due to COVID, in the UK we are unable to allow clients into the veterinary clinic that I work at. As such, all clients are seen outside, which is particularly miserable when a pet needs to be put to sleep. I am assisting a vet with a euthanasia; the pet is in the boot of the car and we are leaning over the patient placing an IV catheter. The family is standing off to the side to give us space, obviously upset and tearful. Unfortunately, the car park is unusually busy for this time of day which is making an already miserable experience even more upsetting and public. This client takes the cake though. She pulls into the car park, rolls down her window and SCREAMS at the top of her lungs at the upset couple in the most disrespectful tone:
Woman: CAN YOU MOVE?! I NEED TO GET INTO THAT SPACE AND YOU’RE BLOCKING IT! HELLOOOO?
I appreciate she had no way of knowing what we were doing in that moment. But my heart broke for that couple. People, please just speak to others with respect. You never know what someone is going through.

I’m with a group of friends who have just finished the last show of their high school play, and so we decide to stop by a restaurant. I’m a year older than they are, and a broke college student, but I go along, planning on just getting a water. Everyone orders their drinks, and the server brings them promptly. I go to take a drink of my water, and see a silverfish (a type of insect) in my glass! I’m grossed out, but not really upset, as I realize things like this happen. I flag down our server, and point out the bug. He is extremely apologetic, and I say that I understand, and ask for a new glass. He comes back with a fresh glass of water and a manager. The manager also apologizes, and offers me a desert on the house! I tell him that it’s not necessary, mostly because I didn’t want the server to get into trouble, but the manager insists. I share my free dessert with my friends, and scrounge up all of my available cash to leave as a tip. It just goes to show that keeping your cool and being polite usually works in your favor!

*I was looking at the menu of the Chester’s at the place and I heard this conversation between a random lady (possibly named Karen) and a girl with Autism*

Lady (yelling, possibly thinking the girl was deaf): SO, DID YOU NEED A CAN OF GINGER ALE?

Autistic girl (visibly angry): yes, and why are yelling so d*mn loud.

Lady: DID YOU NEED TO USE THAT TYPE OF F**GING LANGUAGE?

Autistic girl (again, visibly angry): Well first of all, you’re yelling at somebody with Autism, and sec-

Lady (cutting off the girl): YOU’RE AUTISTIC!! YOU H*E! (going to the Mother of said girl) You should kill that terrible girl with Autism.

The mother: That girl is my f**king daughter!

Lady: DID YOU HAVE TO USE THAT TYPE OF LANGUAGE? I don’t think so.

The mother: let’s go, we’re leaving.

Girl: fine by me.

Lady (visibly angry): YOU KNOW I’M GOING TO TELL THE F**KING MANAGER TO BAN YOU AND YOUR B**CH OF A DAUGHTER FROM GOING HERE!

*Yes, I did nothing to tell her (the lady) to stop. Yes, I told the manager about the whole thing. Yes, she (the lady) was kicked out.*

I’m female and walking with a male friend of mine, since we’ve just come from the same class and are headed in the same general direction. He’s younger than me but doesn’t look it.

Random Guy: “[Friend], you have a girlfriend?!”

Friend: “No . . .”

Me: “But I do!”

Random Guy: “Nice!”

My girlfriend was just as amused as I was.