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Untouched and raw stories: unedited, uncensored, unformatted, and sometimes unbelievable!

Unfiltered Story #282315

, | Unfiltered | January 31, 2023

(Growing up, my dad didn’t think he should think twice about what to say to his daughters, so he had no filter with us. I was a preteen, and had horrible frizzy hair that i wore in a bun at my nape to tame it. One day, I was trying out new hairstyles and decided to put it up in a high ponytail, and arrange it so it fell around my face. I was feeling pretty proud for once and went downstairs to eat my cereal. )

Dad: “Heyyyy sexy hair!”

Me: “Gross dad…”

Mom: “Don’t say that…”

Dad: “But it’s so sexy!”

(Back to the nape bun again. By the way, he never touched me inappropriately
but liked to say uncomfortable things.)

Unfiltered Story #282312

, | Unfiltered | January 31, 2023

I like occasional moment of quiet. My husband, on the other hand, is a guy, who considers a lull in conversation to be his own personal failure. On our very first date, he is very nervous, as I am the first woman he dated in many years. Everything is lovely, but at one moment we just run out of things to talk about.
My future husbabnd (desperate to fill the silence): “Umm, do you know there are eleven species of cockroach in our country, five endemic and six imported?”
After a brief period of shock we had a good laugh about it.
But yesterday, eight years later, he hugs me from behind, as I am brushing my teeth, because he knows how I hate it.
Me (brandishing the toothbrush): “Back off! I have toothbrush and I am not afraid to use it!”
Husband (throws hands in the air): “Why am I even trying? Other women complain about not getting enough attention, and when I try to hug you, you treat me like some kind of cockroach!”
Me: “Well, are you endemic or imported?”
We completely crack up laughing, and he actually kneeled in front of me and pronouced me again the best thing that happened to him.

Unfiltered Story #282310

, , | Unfiltered | January 31, 2023

(I’m right-handed, but prefer my left hand for certain tasks. For my high school health class, we have to do two “healthy habit” projects, each spanning 21 days, and write a report at the end of the 21-day period. One of the options is to develop a skill, and having little patience for this class and not wanting to take on a big project on top of my other classwork, I opt to practice ambidextry and throw together a report about how use of the left hand used to be taboo. This consists mostly of using a computer mouse at home or just writing a sentence or two with my non-dominant hand. I’m talking about the project with my grandma.)

Me: “I just have to practice doing stuff with my left hand. Writing can be really slow, though.”

Grandma: “Wait, are you right-handed?!”

Me: “Yeah?”

Grandma: “Oh, my cotton! I thought you were left-handed!”

(The only explanation we could come up with was that I DID use my left hand for a number of tasks, I wear a watch on my right wrist, and my mother is left-handed, even though none of her children inherited the trait and my grandma has seen me drawing with my right hand.)

Unfiltered Story #282306

, , , | Unfiltered | January 31, 2023

This takes place at the popular Orlando themepark complex that is not operated by a mouse, specifically at the park that is all about adventure, in a series of islands…

Said park has 3 notable water rides, a traditional logflume, a river rapids ride and a large river adventure ride ending in a huge drop thats themed on the most famous of dinosaur film series.

My partner and I had already been on the logflume and rapids rides and whilst we were fairly soaked it was a hot day and we dried out reasonably quickly, we were using a certain well known park guide that had us swerve the river adventure until a couple hours after the other water rides to avoid queues and so when we got round to it we were completely dry again.

I wasnt wild on the idea of being soaked to the bone again after having dried out so I took advantage of an observation area to gauge the amount of soaking we could expect, 12 boats down and just big spray with not a great deal going on the people in the boat, so happy I knew what to expect we queued and soon enough we were ready to board.

Red flag one was the front row seat, red flag two was the kid next to me who outweighed me, red flag 3 was the parents of said kid who must have cracked 600lbs between them, as a result row 1 on this boat was both tightly packed and HEFTY, easily 1000lbs+. Not having any idea how affected by weight the boat would be I just shrugged and enjoyed the ride.

We eventually made it to the finale of the big drop and down we went, however due to the weight up front we did not just put up a load of spray like every other boat I’d seen had, nope, we activated submarine mode and submerged the front end of the boat down to the underlying rails, this scooped some dozens of gallons of (pretty dirty) water directly into and onto me and everyone else on the front row.

profoundly drenched we exited and attempted to dry out but due to the less than springfresh nature of the water we just stank the rest of the day and had to go back to the hotel to change and shower. Predictably all our family back home found it hilarious and the rides been forever christened Jurassic sploosh in honour of the near drowning it inflicted on us.

Unfiltered Story #282304

, , | Unfiltered | January 31, 2023

(My boyfriend and I are looking for a product we need and can’t find it, so my boyfriend goes and asks an employee. I am down the isle and around the corner, but I hear this entire exchange)
Boyfriend: Do you have isopropyl alcohol? Can’t seem to find it.
Employee: Sorry what did you say?
Boyfriend: did I say it wrong? *sounds it out slower* eye-so-pro-pill alcohol. Yeah isopropyl thats right.
Employee: I see purple alcohol?
(He finally understands and says they dont have any. When my boyfriend comes back I whispered “I see purple alcohol” and burst into a fit of giggles. We now call it I see purple alcohol.)