(One of my best friends, whom I’ve known for over ten years, and I are shopping at a well-known alternative punk shop. I’ve found some Harry Potter headphones that I really like and head to the register to check out.)
Cashier: Did you find everything okay?
Me: (note that the cashier is very tall and much older than I am. I’m very shy and also frightened of people significantly larger than myself) Um…yeah…
Cashier: Your total will be [Total].
Me: *fumbles around in purse for like five minutes* H-here.
Cashier: Um…I need two more dollars.
Me: O-o-oh, I’m so sorry! H-here you go!
Cashier: Would you like to donate your change to the homeless?
Me: U-uh, sure?
Friend: Hey [My Name], look at you being a humanitarian!
(I almost hit her. By the way, that cashier was the nicest guy. He was so understanding when my friend told him that I was shy and wasn’t trying to short-change him. Thanks, man!)

(A couple come to the register with about $50 worth of items. I ring them up and tell them the total, and the man takes out his wallet. There is a long pause as the woman just stands there spacing out while her boyfriend stares at her expectantly, since the items seem to be hers. He has a plastic smile on his face.)

Boyfriend: “Really? That’s how it’s going to be?”

Girlfriend: “Well, you have the money.”

Boyfriend: *shakes head in disbelief* “I guess that’s what boyfriends are for.”

Girlfriend. “You work.”

(As I take the money and work on printing out the receipt, the man keeps talking while I have to just stand there and pretend I’m not listening.)

Boyfriend: “Oh, I work. That’s my job. I work and you shop.”

(The way he said everything without really looking at his girlfriend while she just sort of looked off into space was really uncomfortable. I awkwardly handed him the receipt, mentioning the survey on it, and had to take a few minutes after they left to digest the fact that some couples will really subject bystanders to their spending problems.)

(A customer places his order, speaking in what I recognise as a very stereotypical New York accent. He seems irritated.)

Me: “That’ll be £16.50, please.”

Customer: *hands me two $10 bills*

Me: “Um…sir, I’m sorry, but I can’t accept foreign currency.”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “Well, sir, you gave me American dollars, and we can only accept British pounds.”

Customer: “So what? Are you saying you’re too good to take my money?”

Me: “Absolutely not, sir, it’s just that-”

Sir: *growing irate* “Yeah, well, F**K YOU!! This is why women shouldn’t work!”

Me: *taken aback* “Sir, I’m going to have to-”

Customer: “And another thing! Most of you women are too stupid to remember FACTS and HISTORY. WE AMERICANS BEAT YOUR SORRY A***S IN THE REVOLUTIONARY WAR! SO DAMN RIGHT YOU CAN ACCEPT AMERICAN DOLLARS!”

Me: “…”

It’s been a very early start, I’ve dropped my wife off at the train station and i’m sitting down drinking a coffee in my own little world when I hear someone barking orders at me.)

Customer: Sugar.

Me: Hmm, what?

Customer: Sugar!

Me: oh, there some over there. (I gesture to the counter he must have walked past getting his coffee).

Customer: No, you get it for me!

Me: ( I bite my tongue, he is middle aged and looks more than able to walk the few yards, somehow without swear I reply;) Get your own!

(He glares at me for longer than feels comfortable, then finally gets his sugar.)

Customer: See I got the sugar for you!

(I choose to ignore him, yet he glares at me the whole time. I finish my drink and stand up to clear my tray when he rushes over nearly knocking the tray from my hand. He sits proudly where I was sitting.)

Customer: This is my seat, I always sit here.

(Bemused, I shake my head and take my tray over to the tray station, as I go I walk by where he was sitting, and notice something.)

Me: Hey, you forgot your sugar.

Customer: Give that here you little….

(In one movement I pick the sugar up and throw it in the bin, I walk out to the sounds of him swearing loudly and turn back to see the staff rushing over to sort him out.)

[where I work, we have a store credit card. It’s owned by a bank that is entirely separate from the store company.]
Me: Hi, how can I help you?
Customer: [slams credit card on the counter] I want to be able to pay my bill and you need to slide your card to pay it but, I can’t do that because this card is deactivated because someone stole it!
Me: Unfortunately, there’s nothing I can do.. you’d have to contact the number on the back of the card and they can sort it out for you.
Customer: No. You need to fix this now! My payment is due and I need to pay it today!
Me: I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do at the store level.
Customer: Get your manager. He would know what to do!
Manager: Hi, what’s wrong?
Customer: I need to make a payment on my credit card but I can’t because this one is deactivated!
Manager: Then, you need to call the number on the back of your card. There’s nothing we can do here since we don’t make or sell the credit cards. [name] Bank does and they’re the only ones who can assist you.
Customer: So you mean my payment is going to be late because you’re refusing to do anything?
Manager: You can go online to pay or call the number to pay.
Customer: But I heard that there’s a fee if you do!
Manager: [shrugs] I’m sorry. There’s nothing we can do
Customer: I’ll let them know it’s all your fault!
[he storms off]
Me: I’m sure if he asked them, they could waive the fees for him.
Manager: Even then, why did he think that we could do anything?
Me: A lot of people assume that we make the cards. I’ve had several customers come up demanding a new card or asking me to deactivate accounts.